This is Some Intense Shit.

So I was sitting outside, smoking a cigarette, and thinking about sex.

Interesting intro, correct? Well that's exactly what I was doing about 10 minutes ago.
I started thinking about what the moral interests of our blossoming relationship might be.
Then I thought about what mine are. This idea was followed by another, "What would god think?"
This thought was initially thrown away. I told myself, "Fuck god," Then instantly I had another feeling. A weird instinct I should have felt my entire life, "What if, every time I thought about god (in my atheistic mood, anyways. I doubt real religious people are only thinking about that dude when they need an answer.) he was trying to speak to me and guide me?"

I stopped.

I sat in amazement for quite a while. What if that was the truth. Your happy little non-believer actually believed, for a few minutes anyways. I automatically called Sarah and preceded to pass my thoughts her way.
That voicemail was probably reaaaaally confusing.

I don't know what to think anymore. I'm just really really creeped out by the idea. I think it's going to stick in my head for a long time.

Life Has NEVER Been So Much Fun.

So I am loving just about everything right now. Except the snow. Which really put a damper on my mood when I couldn't see boy today.

I can't decide about boy. I mean, I've finally decided that I actually really like him and he's not just a comfort boy. But when I was mad fucked up on Saturday night he said he wanted to ask me out, just not when I was drunk....and since then he hasn't mentioned it once. As sappy and lame as this may sound (and despite how much I completely despise Valentine's Day), I'm thinking it would be really really cute if he took me out to dinner or something. I don't care either way, but it would be nice.

Haha the past few days with him have been...well, let's just say that you can tell how my past few days have been if you glance at my neck..LOLZ.
I never fully understood why people have so much fun sneaking around with each other. I completely understand now. Cars, elevators, the occasional back stairwell...they are ALL way more fun than I ever thought possible. Not that any of you ever needed to know that. I'm just really happy. Except for this snow. Seriously. This is the one time that it really cannot make us have off class tomorrow. I have big plans for when my roommate is gone tomorrow. And if there is no class, she definitely won't leave, and despite how many times she has sexiled me, I'm not about to do the same to her (except this isn't sexiling...I don't really know what to call it).

Oh well. The snow was supposed to stop by midnight, but it's still falling hardcore. It'll probably just be a delay. Which doesn't affect me or my plans at all. Phew.

Amanda sent me a ton of Lil Wayne today. Seriously...the ONLY rapper I actually enjoy listening to. Woo woo!

Wow You ARE Just Like Every Other Guy...

So my friend Mary cleared some things up for me today. She liked Ed, he liked her, he ignored her, he came to me. I liked Ed, he liked me, he ignores me, goes back to her.

You're a nice guy, huh? Bull fucking shit.
Too bad I don't care anymore. Because I've met a fantastic boy, and no matter the first impression I got of him, I really really REALLY like him. And I'm actually convinced that he likes me too.



Boo fucking YAH.


P.S. Chips and salsa are the tastiest treat ever.